everything　you　did　for　Lily。　Tracking　me　down；　helping　my
  parents；　sitting　with　her　for　hours　on　end。　Really。”
  “No　problem。　It’s　what　anyone　would　do　when　someone　they　know
  is　hurt。　No　big　deal。”　Implied　in　this；　of　course；　was　that
  anyone　would　do　it　except　someone　who　happens　to　be
  phenomenally　self…centered　with　whacked…out　priorities；　like
  yours　truly。
  “Alex；　please；　can　we　just　talk　like—”
  “No。　We　really　can’t　talk　about　anything　right　now。　I’ve　been
  around　for　the　last　year　waiting　to　talk　to　you—begging；
  sometimes—and　you　haven’t　been　all　that　interested。　Somewhere
  in　that　year；　I　lost　the　Andy　I　fell　in　love　with。　I’m　not
  sure　how；　I’m　not　exactly　sure　when　it　happened；　but　you　are
  definitely　not　the　same　person　you　were　before　this　job。　My
  Andy　would　have　never　even　entertained　the　idea　of　choosing　a
  fashion　show　or　a　party　or　whatever　over　being　there　for　a
  friend　who　really；　really　needed　her。　Like；really　needed　her。
  Now；　I’m　glad　you　decided　to　e　Home—that　you　know　it　was
  the　right　thing　to　do—but　now　I　need　some　time　to　figure　out
  what’s　going　on　with　me；　and　with　you；　and　with　us。　This　isn’t
  new；　Andy；　not　to　me。　It’s　been　happening　for　a　long；　long
  time—you’ve　just　been　too　busy　to　notice。”
  “Alex；　you　haven’t　given　me　a　single　second　to　sit　down；　face
  to　face；　and　try　to　explain　to　you　what’s　been　going　on。　Maybe
  you’re　right；　maybe　I　am　a　pletely　different　person。　But　I
  don’t　think　so—and　even　if　I’ve　changed；　I　don’t　think　it’sall
  been　for　the　worse。　Have　we　really　grown　apart　that　much？”
  Even　more　than　Lily；　he　was　my　best　friend；　of　that　I　was
  certain；　but　he　hadn’t　been　my　boyfriend　for　many；　many
  months。　I　realized　that　he　was　right：　it　was　time　I　told　him
  so。
  I　took　a　deep　breath　and　said　what　I　knew　was　the　right　thing；
  even　though　it　didn’t　feel　so　great　then。　“You’re　right。”
  “I　am？　You　agree？”
  “Yes。　I’ve　been　really　selfish　and　unfair　to　you。”
  “So　what　now？”　he　asked；　sounding　resigned　but　not
  heartbroken。
  “I　don’t　know。　What　now？　Do　we　just　stop　talking？　Stop　seeing
  each　other？　I　have　no　idea　how　this　is　supposed　to　work。　But　I
  want　you　to　be　a　part　of　my　life；　and　I　can’t　imagine　not
  being　a　part　of　yours。”
  “Me　neither。　But　I’m　not　sure　we’re　going　to　be　able　to　do
  that　for　a　long；　long　time。　We　weren’t　friends　before　we
  started　dating；　and　it　seems　impossible　to　imagine　just　being
  friends　now。　But　who　knows？　Maybe　once　we’ve　both　had　a　lot　of
  time　to　figure　things　out　。　。　。”
  I　hung　up　the　phone　that　first　night　back　and　cried；　not　just
  for　Alex　but　for　everything　that　had　changed　and　shifted
  during　the　past　year。　I’d　strolled　into　Elias…Clark　a
  clueless；　poorly　dressed　little　girl；　and　I’d　staggered　out　a
  slightly　weathered；　poorly　dressed　semigrown…up　（albeit　one
  who　now　realized　just　how　poorly　dressed　she　was）。　But　in　the
  interim；　I’d　experienced　enough　to　fill　a　hundred
  just…out…of…college　jobs。　And　even　though　my　résumé　now
  sported　a　scarlet　“F；”　even　though　my　boyfriend　had　called　it
  quits；　even　though　I’d　left　with　nothing　more　concrete　than　a
  suitcase　（well；　OK；　four　Louis　Vuitton　suitcases）　full　of
  fabulous　designer　clothes—maybe　it　had　been　worth　it？
  I　turned　off　the　ringer　and　pulled　an　old　notebook　from　my
  bottom　desk　drawer　and　began　to　write。
  My　father　had　already　escaped　to　his　office　and　my　mother　was
  on　her　way　to　the　garage　when　I　made　it　downstairs。
  “Morning；　honey。　Didn’t　know　you　were　awake！　I’m　running　out。
  I　have　a　student　at　nine。　Jill’s　flight　is　at　noon；　so　you
  should　probably　leave　sooner　than　later　since　there　will　be
  rush…hour　traffic。　I’ll　have　my　cell　on　if　anything　goes
  wrong。　Oh；　will　you　and　Lily　be　Home　for　dinner　tonight？”
  “I’m　really　not　sure。　I　just　woke　up　and　haven’t　yet　had　a　cup
  of　Coffee。　Do　you　think　I　could　decide　on　dinner　in　a　little
  while？”
  But　she　hadn’t　even　stuck　around　to　listen　to　my　snotty
  response—she　was　halfway　out　the　door　by　the　time　I　opened　my
  mouth。　Lily；　Jill；　Kyle；　and　the　baby　were　sitting　around　the
  kitchen　table　in　silence；　reading　different　sections　of
  theTimes　。　There　was　a　plate　of　wet…looking；　wholly
  unappetizing　waffles　in　the　middle；　with　a　bottle　of　Aunt
  Jemima　and　a　tub　of　butter　straight　from　the　fridge。　The　only
  thing　anyone　appeared　to　be　touching　was　the　Coffee；　which　my
  father　had　picked　up　on　his　morning　run　to　Dunkin　Donuts—a
  tradition　stemming　from　his　understandable　unwillingness　to
  ingest　anything　my　mother　had　made　herself。　I　forked　a　waffle
  onto　a　paper　plate　and　went　to　cut　it；　but　it　immediately
  collapsed　into　a　soggy　pile　of　dough。
  “This　is　inedible。　Did　Dad　pick　up　any　donuts　today？”
  “Yeah；　he　hid　them　in　the　closet　outside　his　office；”　Kyle
  drawled。　“Didn’t　want　your　mother　to　see。　Bring　back　the　box
  if　you’re　going？”
  The　phone　rang　on　my　way　to　seek　out　the　hidden　booty。
  “Hello？”　I　answered　in　my　best　irritated　voice。　I’d　finally
  stopped　answering　any　ringing　phone　with　“Miranda　Priestly’s
  office。”
  “Hello　there。　Is　Andrea　Sachs　there；　please？”
  “Speaking。　May　I　ask　who’s　calling？”
  “Andrea；　hi；　this　is　Loretta　Andriano　fromSeventeen　magazine。”
  My　heart　lurched。　I’d　pitched　a　2；000…word　“fiction”　piece
  about　a　teenage　girl　who　gets　so　caught　up　on　getting　into
  college　that　she　ignores　her　friends　and　family。　It　had　taken
  me　all　of　two　hours　to　write　the　silly　thing；　but　I　thought
  I’d　managed　to　strike　just　the　right　chords　of　funny　and
  touching。
  “Hi！　How　are　you？”
  “I’m　fine；　thank　you。　Listen；　your　story　got　passed　along　to
  me；　and　I　have　to　tell　you—I　love　it。　Needs　some　revisions；　of
  course；　and　the　language　needs　some　tweaking—our　readers　are
  mostly　pre…　and　early　teens—but　I’d　like　to　run　it　in　the
  February　issue。”
  “You　would？”　I　could　hardly　believe　it。　I’d　sent　the　story　to
  a　dozen　teen　magazines　and　then　wrote　a　slightly　more　mature
  version　and　sent　that　to　nearly　two　dozen　women’s　magazines；
  but　I　hadn’t　heard　a　word　back　from　anyone。
  “Absolutely。　We　pay　one…fifty　per　word；　and　I’ll　just　need　to
  have　you　fill　out　a　few　tax　forms。　You’ve　freelanced　stories
  before；　right？”
  “Actually；　no；　but　I　used　to　work　atRunway　。”　I　don’t　know　how
  I　thought　this　would　help—especially　since　the　only　thing　I
  ever　wrote　there　were　forged　memos　meant　to　intimidate　other
  people—but　Loretta　didn’t　appear　to　notice　the　gaping　hole　in
  my　logic。
  “Oh；　really？　My　first　job　out　of　college　was　as　a　fashion
  assistant　atRunway　。　I　learned　more　there　that　year　than　I　did
  in　the　next　five。”
  “It　was　a　real　experience。　I　was　lucky　to　have　it。”
  “What　did　you　do　there？”
  “I　was　actually　Miranda　Priestly’s　assistant。”
  “Were　you　really？　You　poor　girl；　I　had　no　idea。　Wait　a
  minute—were　you　the　one　who　was　just　fired　in　Paris？”
  I　realized　too　late　that　I　had　made　a　big　mistake。　There’d
  been　a　sizable　blurb　inPage　Six　about　the　whole　messy　thing　a
  few　days　after　I　got　Home；　probably　from　one　of　the　Clackers
  who’d　witnessed　my　terrible　manners。　Considering　they　quoted
  me　exactly；　I　couldn’t　figure　out　who　else　it　could’ve　been。
  How　could　I　have　forgotten　that　other　people　might　have　read
  that？　I　had　a　feeling　that　Loretta　was　going　to　be　distinctly
  less　pleased　with　my　story　than　she　was　three　minutes　ago；　but
  there　was　no　escaping　now。
  “Um；　yeah。　It　wasn’t　as　bad　as　it　seemed；　really　it　wasn’t。
  Things　got　totally　blown　out　of　proportion　in　thatPage　Six
  article。　Really。”
  “Well；　I　hope　not！　Someone　needed　to　tell　that　woman　to　go
  fuck　herself；　and　if　it　was　you；　well；　then；　hats　off！　That
  woman　made　my　life　a　living　hell　for　the　year　I　worked　there；
  and　I　never　even　had　to　exchange　a　single　word　with　her。
  “Look；　I’ve　got　to　run　to　a　press　lunch　right　now；　but　why
  don’t　we　set　up　a　meeting？　You　need　to　e　in　and　fill　out
  some　of　these　papers；　and　I’d　like　to　meet　you　anyway。　Bring
  anything　else　you　think　might　work　for　the　magazine。”
  “Great。　Oh；　that　sounds　great。”　We　agreed　to　meet　next　Friday
  at　three；　and　I　hung　up　still　not　believing　what　had　happened。
  Kyle　and　Jill　had　left　the　baby　with　Lily　while　they　went　to
  dress　and　pack；　and　he　had　menced　a　sort　of
  crying…whimpering　thing　that　sounded　as　though　he　was　two
  seconds　away　from　all…out　hysteria。　I　scooped　him　out　of　his
  seat　and　held　him　over　my　shoulder；　rubbing　his　back　through
  his　terry…cloth　footie　pajama