leave　now。”
  The　freak　mashed　his　cigarette　out　and　made　a　big　show　of　throwing
  up　his　hands　in　mock　surrender。　“Dude；　no　problem　whatsoever。　I’ll
  just　take　a　quick　shower　and　give　m’little　Lily　here　a　proper
  good…bye；　and　then　I’ll　be　on　m’way。”　He　swung　his　legs　over　the
  side　of　the　bed　and　reached　for　the　towel　that　hung　next　to　her
  desk。
  Alex　moved　forward；　swiftly　removed　the　towel　from　his　hands；　and
  looked　him　directly　in　the　eye。　“No。　I　think　you　should　leave　now。
  Right　now。”　And　in　a　way　that　I’d　never　seen　him　do　in　the　almost
  three　years　I’d　known　him；　he　placed　himself　squarely　in　front　of
  Freak　Boy　and　allowed　his　height　to　insinuate　the　threat　that　was
  clearly　intended。
  “Dude；　no　worries。　I’m　outta　here；”　he　crooned　after　taking　one　look
  at　Alex　and　realizing　he　had　to　crane　his　neck　to　look　at　his　face。
  “Just　get　m’self　dressed　and　out　the　door。”　He　picked　up　his　jeans
  from　the　floor　and　located　his　ripped…up　T…shirt　from　underneath
  Lily’s　still　exposed　body。　She　moved　when　he　pulled　it　out　from
  under　her；　and　a　few　seconds　later　her　eyes　managed　to　open。
  “Cover　her！”　Alex　manded　gruffly；　now　clearly　enjoying　his　new
  role　as　threatening…man…in…charge。　And　without　ment；　Freak　Boy
  pulled　the　cover　over　her　shoulders　so　that　only　a　tangle　of　her
  black　curls　was　visible。
  “What’s　going　on？”　Lily　croaked　while　willing　her　eyes　to　stay　open。
  She　turned　to　see　me　trembling　in　anger　in　her　doorway；　Alex　hulking
  about　doing　manly　poses；　and　Freak　Boy　scrambling　to　tie　his　blue
  and　canary　yellow　Diadoras　and　get　the　hell　out　before　things　got
  really　ugly。　Too　late。　Her　gaze　stopped　on　Freak　Boy。
  “Who　the　hell　are　you？”　she　asked　him；　bolting　upright　without　even
  realizing　that　she　was　now　pletely　naked。　Alex　and　I
  instinctively　turned　away　while　she　pulled　the　covers　up；　looking
  shocked；　but　Freak　Boy　grinned　lecherously　and　ogled　her　breasts。
  “Baby；　you　tellin’　me　you　don’t　remember　who　I　am？”　he　asked；　his
  thick　Australian　accent　being　less　adorable　with　every　passing
  second。　“You　sure　knew　who　I　was　last　night。”　He　walked　over　to　her
  and　looked　like　he　was　about　to　sit　down　on　the　bed；　but　Alex　had
  already　grabbed　his　arm　and　pulled　him　upright。
  “Out。　Now。　Or　I’m　going　to　have　to　carry　you　myself；”　he　manded；
  looking　tough　and　very　cute　and　not　a　little　proud　of　himself。
  Freak　Boy　threw　up　his　hands　and　made　clucking　noises。　“I’m　outta
  here。　Call　me　sometime；　Lily。　You　were　great　last　night。”　He　moved
  quickly　through　the　bedroom　door　toward　the　living　room　with　Alex　in
  pursuit。　“Man；　she　sure　as　hell　is　a　feisty　one；”　I　heard　him　say　to
  Alex　right　before　the　front　door　slammed　shut；　but　it　didn’t　appear
  that　Lily　had　heard。　She　had　pulled　on　a　T…shirt　and　managed　to　pull
  herself　out　of　bed。
  “Lily；　who　the　hell　was　that？　He　was　the　biggest　jerk　I’ve　ever　met；
  not　to　mention　absolutelydisgusting　。”
  She　shook　her　head　slowly　and　appeared　to　be　concentrating　very
  hard；　trying　to　remember　where　he’d　entered　her　life。　“Disgusting。
  You’re　right；　he　is　absolutely　disgusting；　and　I　have　no　idea　what
  happened。　I　remember　you　leaving　last　night　and　talking　to　some
  really　nice　guy　in　a　suit—we　were　doing　shots　of　Jaeger；　for　some
  reason—and　that’s　it。”
  “Lily；　just　imagine　how　drunk　you　had　to　be　to　agree　to　not　only
  have　sex　with　someone　who　looks　like　that；　but　to　bring　him　back　to
  our　apartment！”　I　thought　I　was　pointing　out　the　obvious；　but　her
  eyes　widened　into　surprised　realization。
  “You　think　I　had　sex　with　him？”　she　asked　softly；　refusing　to
  acknowledge　what　seemed　certain。
  Alex’s　words　from　a　few　months　before　came　back　to　me：　Lily　did
  drink　more　than　was　normal—all　the　signs　were　there。　She　was　missing
  classes　regularly；　had　gotten　arrested；　and　now　had　dragged　Home　the
  scariest…looking　mutant　of　a　guy　I’d　ever　laid　eyes　on。　I　also
  remembered　the　message　one　of　her　professors　had　left　on　our　machine
  right　after　finals；　something　to　the　effect　that　while　Lily’s　final
  paper　had　been　stellar；　she’d　missed　too　many　classes　and　handed
  things　in　too　late　to　give　her　the　“A”　she　deserved。　I　decided　to
  tread　carefully。　“Lil；　sweetie；　I　don’t　think　the　problem　is　the
  guy。　I　think　it’s　the　drinking　that’s　causing　it。”
  She　had　begun　brushing　her　hair；　and　it　wasn’t　until　now　that　I
  realized　it　was　already　six　o’clock　on　a　Friday　night　and　she　was
  just　getting　out　of　bed。　She　wasn’t　protesting；　so　I　continued。
  “It’s　not　that　I　have　any　issue　with　drinking；”　I　said；　trying　to
  keep　the　conversation　relatively　peaceful。　“Clearly；　I’m　not
  antidrinking。　I　just　wonder　if　it’s　gotten　a　little　bit　out　of
  control　lately；　you　know？　Has　everything　been　OK　at　school？”
  She　opened　her　mouth　to　say　something；　but　Alex　popped　his　head　in
  the　door　and　handed　me　my　shrieking　Cell　Phone。　“It’s　her；”　he　said
  and　left　again。Argghhh！　The　woman　had　a　very　special　gift　for
  wrecking　my　life。
  “Sorry；”　I　said　to　Lily；　looking　at　the　phone　warily　as　the　display
  screamed　MP　CELL　over　and　over　again。　“It　usually　only　takes　a
  second　for　her　to　humiliate　or　reprimand　me；　so　hold　that　thought。”
  Lily　set　down　her　brush　and　watched　me　answer。
  “Miran—”　Again；　I’d　almost　answered　the　line　as　though　it　were　her
  own。　“This　is　Andrea；”　I　corrected；　bracing　for　the　barrage。
  “Andrea；　you　know　I　expect　you　there　at　six…thirty　tonight；　do　you
  not？”　she　barked　into　the　phone　without　a　greeting　or　identification
  of　any　sort。
  “Oh；　um；　you　had　said　seven　o’clock　earlier。　I　still　need　to—”
  “I　said　six…thirty　before　and　I’m　saying　it　again
  now。Siiiiix…thiiiiirty　。　Get　it？”　Click。　She’d　hung　up。　I　looked　at
  my　watch。　6：05P　。M。　This　was　a　problem。
  “She　wants　me　there　in　twenty…five　minutes；”　I　stated　out　loud　to　no
  one　in　particular。
  Lily　looked　relieved　for　the　distraction。　“Let’s　get　you　moving
  then；　OK？”
  “We’re　midconversation　here；　and　this　is　important。　What　were　you
  going　to　say　before？”　The　words　were　right；　but　it　was　clear　to　both
  of　us　that　my　mind　was　already　a　million　miles　away。　I’d　already
  decided　there　was　no　time　to　shower；　as　I　now　had　fifteen　minutes　to
  zip　myself　into　black…tie　and　get　into　a　car。
  “Seriously；　Andy；　you’ve　got　to　move。　Go　get　ready—we’ll　do　this
  later。”
  And　once　again　I　was　left　with　no　choice　but　to　move　quickly；　heart
  racing；　climbing　into　my　gown　and　running　a　brush　through　my　hair
  and　trying　to　match　some　of　the　names　with　the　pictures　of　the
  evening’s　guests　that　Emily　had　helpfully　printed　out　earlier。　Lily
  watched　the　whole　thing　unwind　with　mild　amusement；　but　I　knew　she
  was　worrying　about　the　incident　with　Freak　Boy；　and　I　felt　terrible
  I　couldn’t　deal　with　it　right　then。　Alex　was　on　his　phone　with　his
  little　brother；　trying　to　convince　him　that　he　really　was　too　young
  to　go　to　a　movie　at　nine　o’clock　and　that　their　mother　wasn’t　cruel
  in　forbidding　him　to　do　so。
  I　kissed　him　on　the　cheek　as　he　whistled　and　told　me　that　he’d
  probably　meet　some　people　for　dinner　but　to　call　him　later　if　I
  wanted　to　meet　up；　and　ran　as　best　one　can　in　stilts　back　to　the
  living　room；　where　Lily　was　holding　a　gorgeous　piece　of　black　silk
  fabric。　I　looked　at　her　questioningly。
  “A　wrap；　for　your　big　night；”　she　sang；　shaking　it　out　like　a
  bedsheet。　“I　want　my　Andy　to　look　just　as　sophisticated　as　all　the
  big…money　Carolina　rednecks　she’ll　be　serving　tonight　like　a　mon
  waitress。　My　grandmother　bought　it　for　me　years　ago　to　wear　to
  Eric’s　wedding。　I　can’t　decide　if　it’s　gorgeous　or　hideous；　but　it’s
  black…tie　enough　and　it’s　Chanel；　so　it　should　do。”
  I　hugged　her。　“Just　promise　if　Miranda　kills　me　for　saying　the　wrong
  thing　that　you’ll　burn　this　dress　and　make　sure　I’m　buried　in　my
  Brown　sweatpants。　Promise　me！”　She　grabbed　the　mascara　wand　I　was
  waving　about　and　started　working　on　me。
  “You　look　great；　Andy；　really　you　do。　Never　thought　I’d　see　you　in
  an　Oscar　gown　going　to　one　of　Miranda　Priestly’s　parties；　but；　hey；
  you　look　the　part。　Now　go。”
  She　handed　me　the　dangling；　obnoxiously　bright　Judith　Leiber　bag　and
  held　the　door　as　I　walked　into　the　hallway。　“Have　fun！”
  The　car　was　waiting　outside　my　building　and　John—who　was　shaping　up
  to　be　a　first…class　pervert—whistled　as　the　driver　held　the　door
  open　for　me。
  “Knock　’em　dead；　hottie；”　he　called　after　me　with　an　exaggerated
  wink。　“See　ya　late…night。”　He　had　no　idea　where　I　was　going；　of
  course；　but　it　was　forting　that　he　thou