Not　to　be　outdone；　I　swooped　down　on　the　next　largest　deer；　snapping　her　neck　between　my　jaws
  quickly；　so　she　wouldn't　feel　unnecessary　pain。　I　could　feel　Leah's　disgust　warring　with　her　hunger；　and　I
  tried　to　make　it　easier　for　her　by　letting　the　wolf　in　me　have　my　head。　I'd　lived　all…wolf　for　long　enough
  that　I　knew　how　to　be　the　animal　completely；　to　see　his　way　and　think　his　way。　I　let　the　practical　instincts
  take　over；　letting　her　feel　that；　too。　She　hesitated　for　a　second；　but　then；　tentatively；　she　seemed　to　reach
  out　with　her　mind　and　try　to　see　my　way。　It　felt　very　strange—our　minds　were　more　closely　linked　than
  they　had　ever　been　before；　because　we　both　were　trying　to　think　together。
  Strange；　but　it　helped　her。　Her　teeth　cut　through　the　fur　and　skin　of　her　kill's　shoulder；　tearing　away　a
  thick　slab　of　streaming　flesh。　Rather　than　wince　away　as　her　human　thoughts　wanted　to；　she　let　her
  wolf…self　react　instinctively。　It　was　kind　of　a　numbing　thing；　a　thoughtless　thing。　It　let　her　eat　in　peace。
  It　was　easy　for　me　to　do　the　same。　And　I　was　glad　I　hadn't　forgotten　this。　This　would　be　my　life　again
  soon。
  Was　Leah　going　to　be　a　part　of　that　life？　A　week　ago；　I　wouldve　found　that　idea　beyond　horrifying。　I
  wouldn't've
  been　able　to　stand　it。　But　I　knew　her　better　now。　And；　relieved　from　the　constant　pain；　she　wasn't　the
  same　wolf。　Not　the　same　girl。
  We　ate　together　until　we　both　were　full。
  Thanks；she　told　me　later　as　she　was　cleaning　her　muzzle　and　paws　against　the　wet　grass。　I　didn't　bother；
  it　had　just　started　to　drizzle　and　we　had　to　swim　the　river　again　on　our　way　back。　I'd　get　clean　enough。
  That　wasn't　so　bad；　thinking　your　way。
  You're　welcome。
  Seth　was　dragging　when　we　hit　the　perimeter。　I　told　him　to　get　some　sleep；　Leah　and　I　would　take　over
  the　patrol。　Seth's　mind　faded　into　unconsciousness　just　seconds　later。
  You　headed　back　to　the　bloodsuckers？Leah　asked。
  Maybe。
  It's　hard　for　you　to　be　there；　but　hard　to　stay　away；　too。　I　know　how　that　feels。
  You　know；　Leah；　you　might　want　to　think　a　little　bit　about　the　future；　about　what　you　really　want　to　do。
  My　head　is　not　going　to　be　the　happiest　place　on　earth。　And　you'll　have　to　suffer　right　along　with　me。
  She　thought　about　how　to　answer　me。　Wow；　this　is　going　to　sound　bad。　But；　honestly；　it　will　be
  easier　to　deal　with　your　pain　than　face　mine。
  Fair　enough。
  I　know　it's　going　to　be　bad　for　you；　Jacob。　I　understand　that—　maybe　better　than　you　think。　I　don't
  like　her；　but。。。　she's　your　Sam。　She's　everything　you　want　and　everything　you　can't　have。
  I　couldn't　answer。
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  /　know　it's　worse　for　you。　At　least　Sam　is　happy。　At　least　he's　alive　and　well。　I　love　him　enough
  that　I　want　that。　I　want　him　to　have　what's　best　for　him。　She　sighed。　I　just　don't　want　to　stick
  around　to　watch。
  Do　we　need　to　talk　about　this？
  I　think　we　do。　Because　I　want　you　to　know　that　I　won't　make　it　worse　for　you。　Hell；　maybe　I'll　even
  help。　I　wasn'tborn　a　compassionless　shrew。　I　used　to　be　sort　of　nice；　you　know。
  My　memory　doesn't　go　that　far　back。
  We　both　laughed　once。
  I'm　sorry　about　this；　Jacob。　I'm　sorry　you're　in　pain。　I'm　sorry　it's　getting　worse　and　not　better
  Thanks；　Leah。
  She　thought　about　the　things　that　were　worse；　the　black　pictures　in　my　head；　while　I　tried　to　tune　her　out
  without　much　success。　She　was　able　to　look　at　them　with　some　distance；　some　perspective；　and　I　had　to
  admit　that　this　was　helpful。　I　could　imagine　that　maybe　I　would　be　able　to　see　it　that　way；　too；　in　a　few
  years。
  She　saw　the　funny　side　of　the　daily　irritations　that　came　from　hanging　out　around　vampires。　She　liked　my
  ragging　on　Rosalie；　chuckling　internally　and　even　running　through　a　few　blonde　jokes　in　her　mind　that　I
  might　be　able
  to　work　in。　But　then　her　thoughts　turned　serious；　lingering　on　Rosalie's　face　in　a　way　that　confused　me。
  You　know　what's　crazy？she　asked。
  Well；　almost　everything　is　crazy　right　now。　But　what　do　you　mean？
  That　blond　vampire　you　hate　so　much—/　totally　get　her　perspective。
  For　a　second　I　thought　she　was　making　a　joke　that　was　in　very　poor　taste。　And　then；　when　I　realized　she
  was　serious；　the　fury　that　ripped　through　me　was　hard　to　control。　It　was　a　good　thing　we'd　spread　out　to
  run　our　watch。　If　she'd　been　within　biting　distance。。。
  Hold　up！　Let　me　explain！
  Don't　want　to　hear　it　I'm　outta　here。
  Wait！　Wait！she　pleaded　as　I　tried　to　calm　myself　enough　to　phase　back。　C'mon；　Jake！
  Leah；　this　isn't　really　the　best　way　to　convince　me　that　I　want　to　spend　more　time　with　you　in　the　future。
  Yeesh！　What　an　overreaction。　You　don't　even　know　what　I'm　talking　about
  So　whatare　you　talking　about？
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  And　then　she　was　suddenly　the　pain…hardened　Leah　from　before。　I'm　talking　about　being　a　genetic
  dead　end；　Jacob。
  The　vicious　edge　to　her　words　left　me　floundering。　I　hadn't　expected　to　have　my　anger　trumped。
  I　don't　understand。
  Youwould；　if　you　weren't　just　like　the　rest　of　them。　If　my　〃female　sfu/T—she　thought　the　words　with
  a　hard；　sarcastic　tone—　didn't　send　you　running　for　cover　just　like　any　stupid　male；　so　you　could
  actually　pay　attention　to　what　it　all　means。
  Oh。
  Yeah；　so　none　of　us　like　to　think　about　that　stuff　with　her。　Who　would？　Of　course　I　remembered　Leah's
  panic　that　first　month　after　she　joined　the　pack—and　I　remembered　cringing　away　from　it　just　like
  everyone　else。　Because　she　couldn't　be　pregnant—　not　unless　there　was　some　really　freaky　religious
  immaculate　crap　going　on。　She　hadn't　been　with　anyone　since　Sam。　And　then；　when　the　weeks　dragged
  on　and　nothing　turned　into　more　nothing；　she'd　realized　that　her　body　wasn't　following　the　normal　patterns
  anymore。　The　horror—what　was　she　now？　Had　her　body　changed　because　she'd　become　a　werewolf？
  Or　had　she　become　a　werewolf　because　her　body　was　wrong？　The　only　female　werewolf　in　the　history
  of　forever。　Was　that　because　she　wasn't　as　female　as　she　should　be？
  None　of　us　had　wanted　to　deal　with　that　breakdown。　Obviously；　it　wasn't　like　we　could　empathize。
  You　know　why　Sam　thinks　we　imprint；she　thought；　calmer　now。
  Sure。　To　carry　on　the　line。
  Right。　To　make　a　bunch　of　new　little　werewolves。　Survival　of　the　species；　genetic　override。　You're
  drawn　to　the　person　who　gives　you　the　best　chance　to　pass　on　the　wolf　gene。
  I　waited　for　her　to　tell　me　where　she　was　qoinq　with　this。
  If　I　was　any　good　for　that；　Sam　would　have　been　drawn　tome。
  Her　pain　was　enough　that　I　broke　stride　under　it。
  But　I'm　not　There's　something　wrong　with　me。　I　don't　have　the　ability　to　pass　on　the　gene；　apparently；
  despite　my　stellar　bloodlines。　So　I　become　a　freak—　the　girlie…wolf—good　for　nothing　else。　I'm　a
  genetic　dead　end　and　we　both　know　it。
  We　do　not；I　argued　with　her。　That's　just　Sam's　theory。　Imprinting　happens；　but　we　don't　know　why。
  Billy　thinks　it's　something　else。
  I　know；　I　know。　He　thinks　you're　imprinting　to　makestronger　wolves。　Because　you　and　Sam　are　such
  humongous　monsters—　bigger　than　our　fathers。　But　either　way；　I'm　still　not　a　candidate。　I'm。。。　I'm
  menopausal。　I'm　twenty　years　old　and　I'm　menopausal。
  Ugh。　I　so　didn't　want　to　have　this　conversation。　You　don't　know　that；　Leah。　It's　probably　just　the
  whole　frozen…in…time　thing。　When　you　quit　your　wolf　and　start　getting　older　again；　I'm　sure　things
  will。。。　er。。。　pick　right　back　up。
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  /might　think　that—　except　that　no　one's　imprinting　onme；　notwithstanding　my　impressive
  pedigree。　You　know；　she　added　thoughtfully；　if　you　weren't　around；　Seth　would　probably　have　the
  best　claim　to　being　Alpha　—　through　his　blood；　at　least。　Of　course；　no　one　would　ever　consider
  me。。。。
  You　reallywant　to　imprint；　or　be　imprinted　on；　or　whichever？　I　demanded。　What's　wrong　with
  going　out　and　falling　in　love　like　a　normal　person；　Leah？　Imprinting　is　just　another　way　of　getting
  your　choices　taken　away　from　you。
  Sam；　Jared；　Paul；　Quit。。。　they　don't　seem　to　mind。
  None　of　themhave　a　mind　of　their　own。
  You　don't　want　to　imprint？
  Hell；　no！
  That's　just　because　you're　already　in　love　withher。　That　would　go　away；　you　know；　if　you　imprinted。
  You　wouldn't　have　to　hurt　over　her　anymore。
  Do　you　want　to　forget　the　way　you　feel　about　Sam？
  She　deliberated　for　a　moment。　/　think　I　do。
  I　sighed。　She　was　in　a　healthier　place　than　I　was。
  But　back　to　my　original　point；　Jacob。　I　understand　why　your　blond　vampire　is　so　cold—　in　the
  figurative　sense。　She's　focused。　She's　got　her　eyes　on　the　prize；　right？　Because　you　alw