第 30 节
作者:
寻找山吹 更新:2022-11-28 19:12 字数:9322
could not help noting an air of unwonted excitement about the place;
usually so aloof; so coldly serene。 Automobiles standing out in front。
People going up and down。 They didn't look very cheerful。 Just as if it
mattered whether anything happened to her or not!
Tessie walked around the block and stood a moment; uncertainly。
Then she struck off down Grand Avenue and past Donovan's pool shack。
A little group of after…supper idlers stood outside; smoking and gossiping;
as she knew there would be。 As she turned the corner she saw Nap
Ballou among them。 She had known that; too。 As she passed she
looked straight ahead; without bowing。 But just past the Burke House he
caught up with her。 No half…shy 〃Can I walk home with you?〃 from Nap
Ballou。 No。 Instead: 〃Hello; sweetheart!〃
〃Hello; yourself。〃
〃Somebody's looking mighty pretty this evening; all dolled up in
pink。〃
〃Think so?〃 She tried to be pertly indifferent; but it was good to have
someone following; someone walking home with you。 What if he was
old enough to be her father; with graying hair? Lots of the movie heroes
had graying hair at the sides。
They walked for an hour。 Tessie left him at the corner。 She had
once heard her father designate Ballou as 〃that drunken skunk。〃 When
she entered the sitting room her cheeks held an unwonted pink。 Her eyes
were brighter than they had been in months。 Her mother looked up
quickly; peering at her over a pair of steel…rimmed spectacles; very much
askew。
〃Where you been; Tessie?〃
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〃Oh; walkin'。〃
〃Who with?〃
〃Cora。〃
〃Why; she was here; callin' for you; not more'n an hour ago。〃
Tessie; taking off her hat on her way upstairs; met this coolly。 〃Yeh; I
ran into her comin' back。〃
Upstairs; lying fully dressed on her hard little bed; she stared up into
the darkness; thinking; her hands limp at her sides。 Oh; well; what's the
diff? You had to make the best of it。 Everybody makin' a fuss about the
soldiersfeeding 'em; and asking 'em to their houses; and sending 'em
things; and giving dances and picnics and parties so they wouldn't be
lonesome。 Chuck had told her all about it。 The other boys told the
same。 They could just pick and choose their good times。 Tessie's mind
groped about; sensing a certain injustice。 How about the girls? She
didn't put it thus squarely。 Hers was not a logical mind。 Easy enough to
paw over the men… folks and get silly over brass buttons and a uniform。
She put it that way。 She thought of the refrain of a popular song:
〃What Are You Going to Do to Help the Boys?〃 Tessie; smiling a
crooked little smile up there in the darkness; parodied the words deftly:
〃What're you going to do to help the girls?〃 she demanded。 〃What're you
going to do〃 She rolled over on one side and buried her head in her
arms。
There was news again next morning at the watch factory。 Tessie of
the old days had never needed to depend on the other girls for the latest bit
of gossip。 Her alert eye and quick ear had always caught it first。 But of
late she had led a cloistered existence; indifferent to the world about her。
The Chippewa Courier went into the newpaper pile behind the kitchen
door without a glance from Tessie's incurious eye。
She was late this morning。 As she sat down at the bench and fitted
her glass in her eye; the chatter of the others; pitched in the high key of
unusual excitement; penetrated even her listlessness。
〃And they say she never screeched or fainted or anything。 She stood
there; kind of quiet; looking straight ahead; and then all of a sudden she
ran to her pa〃
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〃I feel sorry for her。 She never did anything to me。 She〃
Tessie spoke; her voice penetrating the staccato fragments all about her
and gathering them into a whole。 〃Say; who's the heroine of this picture?
I come in in the middle of the film; I guess。〃
They turned on her with the unlovely eagerness of those who have
ugly news to tell。 They all spoke at once; in short sentences; their voices
high with the note of hysteria。
〃Angie Hatton's beau was killed〃
〃They say his airyoplane fell ten thousand feet〃
〃The news come only last evening about eight〃
〃She won't see nobody but her pa〃
Eight! At eight Tessie had been standing outside Hatton's house;
envying Angie and hating her。 So that explained the people; and the
automobiles; and the excitement。 Tessie was not receiving the news with
the dramatic reaction which its purveyors felt it deserved。 Tessie; turning
from one to the other quietly; had said nothing。 She was pitying Angie。
Oh; the luxury of it! Nap Ballou; coming in swiftly to still the unwonted
commotion in work hours; found Tessie the only one quietly occupied in
that chatter…filled room。 She was smiling as she worked。 Nap Ballou;
bending over her on some pretense that deceived no one; spoke low…
voiced in her ear。 But she veiled her eyes insolently and did not glance
up。 She hummed contentedly all the morning at her tedious work。
She had promised Nap Ballou to go picknicking with him Sunday。
Down the river; boating; with supper on shore。 The small; still voice
within her had said; 〃Don't go! Don't go!〃 But the harsh; high…pitched;
reckless overtone said; 〃Go on! Have a good time。 Take all you can
get。〃
She would have to lie at home and she did it。 Some fabrication about
the girls at the watchworks did the trick。 Fried chicken; chocolate cake。
She packed them deftly and daintily。 High…heeled shoes; flimsy blouse;
rustling skirt。 Nap Ballou was waiting for her over in the city park。 She
saw him before he espied her。 He was leaning against a tree; idly; staring
straight ahead with queer; lackluster eyes。 Silhouetted there against the
tender green of the pretty square; he looked very old; somehow; and
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different much older than he looked in his shop clothes; issuing orders。
Tessie noticed that he sagged where he should have stuck out; and
protruded where he should have been flat。 There flashed across her mind
a vividly clear picture of Chuck as she had last seen himbrown; fit; high
of chest; flat of stomach; slim of flank。
Ballou saw her。 He straightened and came toward her swiftly。
〃Somebody looks mighty sweet this afternoon。〃
Tessie plumped the heavy lunch box into his arms。 〃When you get a
line you like you stick to it; don't you?〃
Down at the boathouse even Tessie; who had confessed ignorance of
boats and oars; knew that Ballou was fumbling clumsily。 He stooped to
adjust the oars to the oarlocks。 His hat was off。 His hair looked very
gray in the cruel spring sunshine。 He straightened and smiled up at her。
〃Ready in a minute; sweetheart;〃 he said。 He took off his collar and
turned in the neckband of his shirt。 His skin was very white。 Tessie felt
a little shudder of disgust sweep over her; so that she stumbled a little as
she stepped into the boat。
The river was very lovely。 Tessie trailed her fingers in the water and
told herself that she was having a grand time。 She told Nap the same
when he asked her。
〃Having a good time; little beauty?〃 he said。 He was puffing a little
with the unwonted exercise。
Tessie tried some of her old…time pertness of speech。 〃Oh; good
enough; c