unconsciously　revealed　her　absolute　love　of　self。　I　seemed　to　see　her
  as　she　one　day　would　be；　alone　in　the　world；　with　no　one　to　whom　she
  could　stretch　her　hand；　with　no　friendly　eyes　for　her　own　to　meet　and
  rest　upon。　I　was　bold　enough　to　set　this　before　her　one　evening；　I
  painted　in　vivid　colors　her　lonely；　sad；　deserted　old　age。　Her　comment
  on　this　prospect　of　so　terrible　a　revenge　of　thwarted　nature　was
  horrible。
  〃　'I　shall　always　have　money；'　she　said；　'and　with　money　we　can　always
  inspire　such　sentiments　as　are　necessary　for　our　comfort　in　those
  about　us。'
  〃I　went　away　confounded　by　the　arguments　of　luxury；　by　the　reasoning
  of　this　woman　of　the　world　in　which　she　lived；　and　blamed　myself　for
  my　infatuated　idolatry。　I　myself　had　not　loved　Pauline　because　she　was
  poor；　and　had　not　the　wealthy　Foedora　a　right　to　repulse　Raphael？
  Conscience　is　our　unerring　judge　until　we　finally　stifle　it。　A
  specious　voice　said　within　me；　'Foedora　is　neither　attracted　to　nor
  repulses　any　one；　she　has　her　liberty；　but　once　upon　a　time　she　sold
  herself　to　the　Russian　count；　her　husband　or　her　lover；　for　gold。　But
  temptation　is　certain　to　enter　into　her　life。　Wait　till　that　moment
  comes！'　She　lived　remote　from　humanity；　in　a　sphere　apart；　in　a　hell
  or　a　heaven　of　her　own；　she　was　neither　frail　nor　virtuous。　This
  feminine　enigma　in　embroideries　and　cashmeres　had　brought　into　play
  every　emotion　of　the　human　heart　in　mepride；　ambition；　love；
  curiosity。
  〃There　was　a　craze　just　then　for　praising　a　play　at　a　little　Boulevard
  theatre；　prompted　perhaps　by　a　wish　to　appear　original　that　besets　us
  all；　or　due　to　some　freak　of　fashion。　The　countess　showed　some　signs
  of　a　wish　to　see　the　floured　face　of　the　actor　who　had　so　delighted
  several　people　of　taste；　and　I　obtained　the　honor　of　taking　her　to　a
  first　presentation　of　some　wretched　farce　or　other。　A　box　scarcely
  cost　five　francs；　but　I　had　not　a　brass　farthing。　I　was　but　half…way
  through　the　volume　of　Memoirs；　I　dared　not　beg　for　assistance　of
  Finot；　and　Rastignac；　my　providence；　was　away。　These　constant
  perplexities　were　the　bane　of　my　life。
  〃We　had　once　come　out　of　the　theatre　when　it　was　raining　heavily；
  Foedora　had　called　a　cab　for　me　before　I　could　escape　from　her　show　of
  concern；　she　would　not　admit　any　of　my　excusesmy　liking　for　wet
  weather；　and　my　wish　to　go　to　the　gaming…table。　She　did　not　read　my
  poverty　in　my　embarrassed　attitude；　or　in　my　forced　jests。　My　eyes
  would　redden；　but　she　did　not　understand　a　look。　A　young　man's　life　is
  at　the　mercy　of　the　strangest　whims！　At　every　revolution　of　the　wheels
  during　the　journey；　thoughts　that　burned　stirred　in　my　heart。　I　tried
  to　pull　up　a　plank　from　the　bottom　of　the　vehicle；　hoping　to　slip
  through　the　hole　into　the　street；　but　finding　insuperable　obstacles；　I
  burst　into　a　fit　of　laughter；　and　then　sat　stupefied　in　calm
  dejection；　like　a　man　in　a　pillory。　When　I　reached　my　lodging；　Pauline
  broke　in　through　my　first　stammering　words　with：
  〃　'If　you　haven't　any　money？'
  〃Ah；　the　music　of　Rossini　was　as　nothing　compared　with　those　words。
  But　to　return　to　the　performance　at　the　Funambules。
  〃I　thought　of　pawning　the　circlet　of　gold　round　my　mother's　portrait
  in　order　to　escort　the　countess。　Although　the　pawnbroker　loomed　in　my
  thoughts　as　one　of　the　doors　of　a　convict's　prison；　I　would　rather
  myself　have　carried　my　bed　thither　than　have　begged　for　alms。　There　is
  something　so　painful　in　the　expression　of　a　man　who　asks　money　of　you！
  There　are　loans　that　mulct　us　of　our　self…respect；　just　as　some
  rebuffs　from　a　friend's　lips　sweep　away　our　last　illusion。
  〃Pauline　was　working；　her　mother　had　gone　to　bed。　I　flung　a　stealthy
  glance　over　the　bed；　the　curtains　were　drawn　back　a　little；　Madame
  Gaudin　was　in　a　deep　sleep；　I　thought；　when　I　saw　her　quiet；　sallow
  profile　outlined　against　the　pillow。
  〃　'You　are　in　trouble？'　Pauline　said；　dipping　her　brush　into　the
  coloring。
  〃　'It　is　in　your　power　to　do　me　a　great　service；　my　dear　child；'　I
  answered。
  〃The　gladness　in　her　eyes　frightened　me。
  〃　'Is　it　possible　that　she　loves　me？'　I　thought。　'Pauline；'　I　began。　I
  went　and　sat　near　to　her；　so　as　to　study　her。　My　tones　had　been　so
  searching　that　she　read　my　thought；　her　eyes　fell；　and　I　scrutinized
  her　face。　It　was　so　pure　and　frank　that　I　fancied　I　could　see　as
  clearly　into　her　heart　as　into　my　own。
  〃　'Do　you　love　me？'　I　asked。
  〃　'A　little；passionatelynot　a　bit！'　she　cried。
  〃Then　she　did　not　love　me。　Her　jesting　tones；　and　a　little　gleeful
  movement　that　escaped　her；　expressed　nothing　beyond　a　girlish；　blithe
  goodwill。　I　told　her　about　my　distress　and　the　predicament　in　which　I
  found　myself；　and　asked　her　to　help　me。
  〃　'You　do　not　wish　to　go　to　the　pawnbroker's　yourself；　M。　Raphael；'
  she　answered；　'and　yet　you　would　send　me！'
  〃I　blushed　in　confusion　at　the　child's　reasoning。　She　took　my　hand　in
  hers　as　if　she　wanted　to　compensate　for　this　home…truth　by　her　light
  touch　upon　it。
  〃　'Oh；　I　would　willingly　go；'　she　said；　'but　it　is　not　necessary。　I
  found　two　five…franc　pieces　at　the　back　of　the　piano；　that　had　slipped
  without　your　knowledge　between　the　frame　and　the　keyboard；　and　I　laid
  them　on　your　table。'
  〃　'You　will　soon　be　coming　into　some　money；　M。　Raphael；'　said　the　kind
  mother；　showing　her　face　between　the　curtains；　'and　I　can　easily　lend
  you　a　few　crowns　meanwhile。'
  〃　'Oh；　Pauline！'　I　cried；　as　I　pressed　her　hand；　'how　I　wish　that　I
  were　rich！'
  〃　'Bah！　why　should　you？'　she　said　petulantly。　Her　hand　shook　in　mine
  with　the　throbbing　of　her　pulse；　she　snatched　it　away；　and　looked　at
  both　of　mine。
  〃　'You　will　marry　a　rich　wife；'　she　said；　'but　she　will　give　you　a
  great　deal　of　trouble。　Ah；　Dieu！　she　will　be　your　death；I　am　sure　of
  it。'
  〃In　her　exclamation　there　was　something　like　belief　in　her　mother's
  absurd　superstitions。
  〃　'You　are　very　credulous；　Pauline！'
  〃　'The　woman　whom　you　will　love　is　going　to　kill　youthere　is　no
  doubt　of　it；'　she　said；　looking　at　me　with　alarm。
  〃She　took　up　her　brush　again　and　dipped　it　in　the　color；　her　great
  agitation　was　evident；　she　looked　at　me　no　longer。　I　was　ready　to　give
  credence　just　then　to　superstitious　fancies；　no　man　is　utterly
  wretched　so　long　as　he　is　superstitious；　a　belief　of　that　kind　is
  often　in　reality　a　hope。
  〃I　found　that　those　two　magnificent　five…franc　pieces　were　lying；　in
  fact；　upon　my　table　when　I　reached　my　room。　During　the　first　confused
  thoughts　of　early　slumber；　I　tried　to　audit　my　accounts　so　as　to
  explain　this　unhoped…for　windfall；　but　I　lost　myself　in　useless
  calculations；　and　slept。　Just　as　I　was　leaving　my　room　to　engage　a　box
  the　next　morning；　Pauline　came　to　see　me。
  〃　'Perhaps　your　ten　francs　is　not　enough；'　said　the　amiable；　kind…
  hearted　girl；　'my　mother　told　me　to　offer　you　this　money。　Take　it；
  please；　take　it！'
  〃She　laid　three　crowns　upon　the　table；　and　tried　to　escape；　but　I
  would　not　let　her　go。　Admiration　dried　the　tears　that　sprang　to　my
  eyes。
  〃　'You　are　an　angel；　Pauline；'　I　said。　'It　is　not　the　loan　that
  touches　me　so　much　as　the　delicacy　with　which　it　is　offered。　I　used　to
  wish　for　a　rich　wife；　a　fashionable　woman　of　rank；　and　now；　alas！　I
  would　rather　possess　millions；　and　find　some　girl；　as　poor　as　you　are；
  with　a　generous　nature　like　your　own；　and　I　would　renounce　a　fatal
  passion　which　will　kill　me。　Perhaps　what　you　told　me　will　come　true。'
  〃　'That　is　enough；'　she　said；　and　fled　away；　the　fresh　trills　of　her
  birdlike　voice　rang　up　the　staircase。
  〃　'She　is　very　happy　in　not　yet　knowing　love；'　I　said　to　myself；
  thinking　of　the　torments　I　had　endured　for　many　months　past。
  〃Pauline's　fifteen　francs　were　invaluable　to　me。　Foedora；　thinking　of
  the　stifling　odor　of　the　crowded　place　where　we　were　to　spend　several
  hours；　was　sorry　that　she　had　not　brought　a　bouquet；　I　went　in　search
  of　flowers　for　her；　as　I　had　laid　already　my　life　and　my　fate　at　her
  feet。　With　a　pleasure　in　which　compunction　mingled；　I　gave　her　a
  bouquet。　I　learned　from　its　price　the　extravagance　of　superficial
  gallantry　in　the　world。　But　very　soon　she　complained　of　the　heavy
  scent　of　a　Mexican　jessamine。　The　interior　of　the　theatre；　the　bare
  bench　on　which　she　was　to　sit；　filled　her　with　intolerable　disgust；
  she　upbraided　me　for　bringing　her　there。　Although　she　sat　beside　me；
  she　wished　to　go；　and　she　went。　I　had　spent　sleepless　nights；　and
  squandered　two　months　of　my　life　for　her；　and　I　could　not　please　her。
  Never　had　that　tormenting　spirit　been　more　unfeeling　or　more
  fascinating。
  〃I　sat　beside　her　in　the　cramped　back　seat　of　the　vehicle；　all　the　way
  I　could　feel　her　breath　on　me　and　the　contact　of　her　perfumed　glove；　I
  saw　distinctly　all　her　exceeding　beauty；　I　inhaled　a　vague　scent　of
  orris…root；　so　wholly　a　woman　she　was；　with　no　touch　of　womanhood。
  Just　then　a　sudden　gleam　of　light　lit　up　the　depths　of　this　mysterious
  life　for　me。　I　thought　all　at　once　of　a　book　just　published　by　a　poet；
  a　genuine　conception　of　the　artist；　in　the　shape　of　the　statue　of
  Polycletus。
  〃I　seemed　to　see　that　monstrous　creation；　at　one　time　an　officer；
  breaking　in　a　spirited　horse；　at　another；　a　girl；　who　gives　herself　up
  to　her　toilette　and