errands　for　some　insipid　affected　woman；　all　this　disgusts　an　artist。
  Love　in　the　abstract　is　not　enough　for　a　great　man　in　poverty；　he　has
  need　of　its　utmost　devotion。　The　frivolous　creatures　who　spend　their
  lives　in　trying　on　cashmeres；　or　make　themselves　into　clothes…pegs　to
  hang　the　fashions　from；　exact　the　devotion　which　is　not　theirs　to
  give；　for　them；　love　means　the　pleasure　of　ruling　and　not　of　obeying。
  She　who　is　really　a　wife；　one　in　heart；　flesh；　and　bone；　must　follow
  wherever　he　leads；　in　whom　her　life；　her　strength；　her　pride；　and
  happiness　are　centered。　Ambitious　men　need　those　Oriental　women　whose
  whole　thought　is　given　to　the　study　of　their　requirements；　for
  unhappiness　means　for　them　the　incompatibility　of　their　means　with
  their　desires。　But　I；　who　took　myself　for　a　man　of　genius；　must　needs
  feel　attracted　by　these　very　she…coxcombs。　So；　as　I　cherished　ideas　so
  different　from　those　generally　received；　as　I　wished　to　scale　the
  heavens　without　a　ladder；　was　possessed　of　wealth　that　could　not
  circulate；　and　of　knowledge　so　wide　and　so　imperfectly　arranged　and
  digested　that　it　overtaxed　my　memory；　as　I　had　neither　relations　nor
  friends　in　the　midst　of　this　lonely　and　ghastly　desert；　a　desert　of
  paving　stones；　full　of　animation；　life；　and　thought；　wherein　every　one
  is　worse　than　inimical；　indifferent　to　wit；　I　made　a　very　natural　if
  foolish　resolve；　which　required　such　unknown　impossibilities；　that　my
  spirits　rose。　It　was　as　if　I　had　laid　a　wager　with　myself；　for　I　was
  at　once　the　player　and　the　cards。
  〃This　was　my　plan。　The　eleven　hundred　francs　must　keep　life　in　me　for
  three　yearsthe　time　I　allowed　myself　in　which　to　bring　to　light　a
  work　which　should　draw　attention　to　me；　and　make　me　either　a　name　or　a
  fortune。　I　exulted　at　the　thought　of　living　on　bread　and　milk；　like　a
  hermit　in　the　Thebaid；　while　I　plunged　into　the　world　of　books　and
  ideas；　and　so　reached　a　lofty　sphere　beyond　the　tumult　of　Paris；　a
  sphere　of　silent　labor　where　I　would　entomb　myself　like　a　chrysalis　to
  await　a　brilliant　and　splendid　new　birth。　I　imperiled　my　life　in　order
  to　live。　By　reducing　my　requirements　to　real　needs　and　the　barest
  necessaries；　I　found　that　three　hundred　and　sixty…five　francs　sufficed
  for　a　year　of　penury；　and；　in　fact；　I　managed　to　exist　on　that　slender
  sum；　so　long　as　I　submitted　to　my　own　claustral　discipline。〃
  〃Impossible！〃　cried　Emile。
  〃I　lived　for　nearly　three　years　in　that　way；〃　Raphael　answered；　with　a
  kind　of　pride。　〃Let　us　reckon　it　out。　Three　sous　for　bread；　two　for
  milk；　and　three　for　cold　meat；　kept　me　from　dying　of　hunger；　and　my
  mind　in　a　state　of　peculiar　lucidity。　I　have　observed；　as　you　know；
  the　wonderful　effects　produced　by　diet　upon　the　imagination。　My
  lodgings　cost　me　three　sous　daily；　I　burnt　three　sous　more　in　oil　at
  night；　I　did　my　own　housework；　and　wore　flannel　shirts　so　as　to　reduce
  the　laundress'　bill　to　two　sous　per　day。　The　money　I　spent　yearly　in
  coal；　if　divided　up；　never　cost　more　than　two　sous　for　each　day。　I　had
  three　years'　supply　of　clothing；　and　I　only　dressed　when　going　out　to
  some　library　or　public　lecture。　These　expenses；　all　told；　only
  amounted　to　eighteen　sous；　so　two　were　left　over　for　emergencies。　I
  cannot　recollect；　during　that　long　period　of　toil；　either　crossing　the
  Pont　des　Arts；　or　paying　for　water；　I　went　out　to　fetch　it　every
  morning　from　the　fountain　in　the　Place　Saint　Michel；　at　the　corner　of
  the　Rue　de　Gres。　Oh；　I　wore　my　poverty　proudly。　A　man　urged　on　towards
  a　fair　future　walks　through　life　like　an　innocent　person　to　his　death；
  he　feels　no　shame　about　it。
  〃I　would　not　think　of　illness。　Like　Aquilina；　I　faced　the　hospital
  without　terror。　I　had　not　a　moment's　doubt　of　my　health；　and　besides；
  the　poor　can　only　take　to　their　beds　to　die。　I　cut　my　own　hair　till
  the　day　when　an　angel　of　love　and　kindness　。　。　。　But　I　do　not　want　to
  anticipate　the　state　of　things　that　I　shall　reach　later。　You　must
  simply　know　that　I　lived　with　one　grand　thought　for　a　mistress；　a
  dream；　an　illusion　which　deceives　us　all　more　or　less　at　first。　To…day
  I　laugh　at　myself；　at　that　self；　holy　perhaps　and　heroic；　which　is　now
  no　more。　I　have　since　had　a　closer　view　of　society　and　the　world；　of
  our　manners　and　customs；　and　seen　the　dangers　of　my　innocent　credulity
  and　the　superfluous　nature　of　my　fervent　toil。　Stores　of　that　sort　are
  quite　useless　to　aspirants　for　fame。　Light　should　be　the　baggage　of
  seekers　after　fortune！
  〃Ambitious　men　spend　their　youth　in　rendering　themselves　worthy　of
  patronage；　it　is　their　great　mistake。　While　the　foolish　creatures　are
  laying　in　stores　of　knowledge　and　energy；　so　that　they　shall　not　sink
  under　the　weight　of　responsible　posts　that　recede　from　them；　schemers
  come　and　go　who　are　wealthy　in　words　and　destitute　in　ideas；　astonish
  the　ignorant；　and　creep　into　the　confidence　of　those　who　have　a　little
  knowledge。　While　the　first　kind　study；　the　second　march　ahead；　the　one
  sort　is　modest；　and　the　other　impudent；　the　man　of　genius　is　silent
  about　his　own　merits；　but　these　schemers　make　a　flourish　of　theirs；
  and　they　are　bound　to　get　on。　It　is　so　strongly　to　the　interest　of　men
  in　office　to　believe　in　ready…made　capacity；　and　in　brazen…faced
  merit；　that　it　is　downright　childish　of　the　learned　to　expect　material
  rewards。　I　do　not　seek　to　paraphrase　the　commonplace　moral；　the　song
  of　songs　that　obscure　genius　is　for　ever　singing；　I　want　to　come；　in　a
  logical　manner；　by　the　reason　of　the　frequent　successes　of　mediocrity。
  Alas！　study　shows　us　such　a　mother's　kindness　that　it　would　be　a　sin
  perhaps　to　ask　any　other　reward　of　her　than　the　pure　and　delightful
  pleasures　with　which　she　sustains　her　children。
  〃Often　I　remember　soaking　my　bread　in　milk；　as　I　sat　by　the　window　to
  take　the　fresh　air；　while　my　eyes　wandered　over　a　view　of　roofs
  brown；　gray；　or　red；　slated　or　tiled；　and　covered　with　yellow　or　green
  mosses。　At　first　the　prospect　may　have　seemed　monotonous；　but　I　very
  soon　found　peculiar　beauties　in　it。　Sometimes　at　night；　streams　of
  light　through　half…closed　shutters　would　light　up　and　color　the　dark
  abysses　of　this　strange　landscape。　Sometimes　the　feeble　lights　of　the
  street　lamps　sent　up　yellow　gleams　through　the　fog；　and　in　each　street
  dimly　outlined　the　undulations　of　a　crowd　of　roofs；　like　billows　in　a
  motionless　sea。　Very　occasionally；　too；　a　face　appeared　in　this　gloomy
  waste；　above　the　flowers　in　some　skyey　garden　I　caught　a　glimpse　of　an
  old　woman's　crooked　angular　profile　as　she　watered　her　nasturtiums；
  or；　in　a　crazy　attic　window；　a　young　girl；　fancying　herself　quite
  alone　as　she　dressed　herselfa　view　of　nothing　more　than　a　fair
  forehead　and　long　tresses　held　above　her　by　a　pretty　white　arm。
  〃I　liked　to　see　the　short…lived　plant…life　in　the　gutterspoor　weeds
  that　a　storm　soon　washed　away。　I　studied　the　mosses；　with　their　colors
  revived　by　showers；　or　transformed　by　the　sun　into　a　brown　velvet　that
  fitfully　caught　the　light。　Such　things　as　these　formed　my　recreations
  the　passing　poetic　moods　of　daylight；　the　melancholy　mists；　sudden
  gleams　of　sunlight；　the　silence　and　the　magic　of　night；　the　mysteries
  of　dawn；　the　smoke　wreaths　from　each　chimney；　every　chance　event；　in
  fact；　in　my　curious　world　became　familiar　to　me。　I　came　to　love　this
  prison　of　my　own　choosing。　This　level　Parisian　prairie　of　roofs；
  beneath　which　lay　populous　abysses；　suited　my　humor；　and　harmonized
  with　my　thoughts。
  〃Sudden　descents　into　the　world　from　the　divine　height　of　scientific
  meditation　are　very　exhausting；　and；　besides；　I　had　apprehended
  perfectly　the　bare　life　of　the　cloister。　When　I　made　up　my　mind　to
  carry　out　this　new　plan　of　life；　I　looked　for　quarters　in　the　most
  out…of…the…way　parts　of　Paris。　One　evening；　as　I　returned　home　to　the
  Rue　des　Cordiers　from　the　Place　de　l'Estrapade；　I　saw　a　girl　of
  fourteen　playing　with　a　battledore　at　the　corner　of　the　Rue　de　Cluny；
  her　winsome　ways　and　laughter　amused　the　neighbors。　September　was　not
  yet　over；　it　was　warm　and　fine；　so　that　women　sat　chatting　before
  their　doors　as　if　it　were　a　fete…day　in　some　country　town。　At　first　I
  watched　the　charming　expression　of　the　girl's　face　and　her　graceful
  attitudes；　her　pose　fit　for　a　painter。　It　was　a　pretty　sight。　I　looked
  about　me；　seeking　to　understand　this　blithe　simplicity　in　the　midst　of
  Paris；　and　saw　that　the　street　was　a　blind　alley　and　but　little
  frequented。　I　remembered　that　Jean　Jacques　had　once　lived　here；　and
  looked　up　the　Hotel　Saint…Quentin。　Its　dilapidated　condition　awakened
  hopes　of　a　cheap　lodging；　and　I　determined　to　enter。
  〃I　found　myself　in　a　room　with　a　low　ceiling；　the　candles；　in　classic…
  looking　copper　candle…sticks；　were　set　in　a　row　under　each　key。　The
  predominating　cleanliness　of　the　room　made　a　striking　contrast　to　the
  usual　state　of　such　places。　This　one　was　as　neat　as　a　bit　of　genre；
  there　was　a　charming　trimness　about　the　blue　coverlet；　the　cooking
  pots　and　furniture。　The　mistress　of　the　house　rose　and　came　to　me。　She
  seemed　to　be　about　forty　years　of　age；　sorrows　had　left　their　traces
  on　her　features；　and　weeping　had　dimmed　her　eyes。　I　deferentially
  mentioned　the　amount　I　could　pay；　it　seemed　to　cause　her　no　surprise；
  she　s