第 3 节
作者:
青涩春天 更新:2022-07-12 16:21 字数:9322
but he can hold nothing in his fingers。 He can still articulate;
but he may wake speechless to…morrow or next day。 If I give him a
week more to live; I give him what I honestly believe to be the
utmost length of his span。 At his own request I told him; as
carefully and as tenderly as I could; what I have just told you。
The result was very distressing; the violence of the patient's
agitation was a violence which I despair of describing to you。 I
took the liberty of asking him whether his affairs were
unsettled。 Nothing of the sort。 His will is in the hands of his
executor in London; and he leaves his wife and child well
provided for。 My next question succeeded better; it hit the mark:
'Have you something on your mind to do before you die which is
not done yet?' He gave a great gasp of relief; which said; as no
words could have said it; Yes。 'Can I help you?' 'Yes。 I have
something to write that I _must_ write; can you make me hold a
pen?'
〃He might as well have asked me if I could perform a miracle。 I
could only say No。 'If I dictate the words;' he went on; 'can you
write what I tell you to write?' Once more I could only say No。 I
understand a little English; but I can neither speak it nor write
it。 Mr。 Armadale understands French when it is spoken (as I speak
it to him) slowly; but he cannot express himself in that
language; and of German he is totally ignorant。 In this
difficulty; I said; what any one else in my situation would have
said: 'Why ask _me?_ there is Mrs。 Armadale at your service in
the next room。' Before I could get up from my chair to fetch her;
he stopped menot by words; but by a look of horror which fixed
me; by main force of astonishment; in my place。 'Surely;' I said;
'your wife is the fittest person to write for you as you desire?'
'The last person under heaven!' he answered。 'What!' I said; 'you
ask me; a foreigner and a stranger; to write words at your
dictation which you keep a secret from your wife!' Conceive my
astonishment when he answered me; without a moment's hesitation;
'Yes!' I sat lost; I sat silent。 'If _you_ can't write English;'
he said; 'find somebody who can。' I tried to remonstrate。 He
burst into a dreadful moaning crya dumb entreaty; like the
entreaty of a dog。 'Hush! hush!' I said; 'I will find somebody。'
'To…day!' he broke out; 'before my speech fails me; like my
hand。' 'To…day; in an hour's time。' He shut his eyes; he quieted
himself instantly。 'While I am waiting for you;' he said; 'let me
see my little boy。' He had shown no tenderness when he spoke of
his wife; but I saw the tears on his cheeks when he asked for his
child。 My profession; sir; has not made me so hard a man as you
might think; and my doctor's heart was as heavy; when I went out
to fetch the child; as if I had not been a doctor at all。 I am
afraid you think this rather weak on my part?〃
The doctor looked appealingly at Mr。 Neal。 He might as well have
looked at a rock in the Black Forest。 Mr。 Neal entirely declined
to be drawn by any doctor in Christendom out of the regions of
plain fact。
〃Go on;〃 he said。 〃I presume you have not told me all that you
have to tell me; yet?〃
〃Surely you understand my object in coming here; now?〃 returned
the other
〃Your object is plain enough; at last。 You invite me to connect
myself blindfold with a matter which is in the last degree
suspicious; so far。 I decline giving you any answer until I know
more than I know now。 Did you think it necessary to inform this
man's wife of what had passed between you; and to ask her for an
explanation?〃
〃Of course I thought it necessary!〃 said the doctor; indignant at
the reflection on his humanity which the question seemed to
imply。 〃If ever I saw a woman fond of her husband; and sorry for
her husband; it is this unhappy Mrs。 Armadale。 As soon as we were
left alone together; I sat down by her side; and I took her hand
in mine。 Why not? I am an ugly old man; and I may allow myself
such liberties as these!〃
〃Excuse me;〃 said the impenetrable Scotchman。 〃I beg to suggest
that you are losing the thread of the narrative。〃
〃Nothing more likely;〃 returned the doctor; recovering his good
humor。 〃It is in the habit of my nation to be perpetually losing
the thread; and it is evidently in the habit of yours; sir; to be
perpetually finding it。 What an example here of the order of the
universe; and the everlasting fitness of things!〃
〃Will you oblige me; once for all; by confining yourself to the
facts;〃 persisted Mr。 Neal; frowning impatiently。 〃May I inquire;
for my own information; whether Mrs。 Armadale could tell you what
it is her husband wishes me to write; and why it is that he
refuses to let her write for him?〃
〃There is my thread foundand thank you for finding it!〃 said
the doctor。 〃You shall hear what Mrs。 Armadale had to tell me; in
Mrs。 Armadale's own words。 'The cause that now shuts me out of
his confidence;' she said; 'is; I firmly believe; the same cause
that has always shut me out of his heart。 I am the wife he has
wedded; but I am not the woman he loves。 I knew when he married
me that another man had won from him the woman he loved。 I
thought I could make him forget her。 I hoped when I married him;
I hoped again when I bore him a son。 Need I tell you the end of
my hopesyou have seen it for yourself。' (Wait; sir; I entreat
you! I have not lost the thread again; I am following it inch by
inch。) 'Is this all you know?' I asked。 'All I knew;' she said;
'till a short time since。 It was when we were in Switzerland; and
when his illness was nearly at its worst; that news came to him
by accident of that other woman who has been the shadow and the
poison of my lifenews that she (like me) had borne her husband
a son。 On the instant of his making that discoverya trifling
discovery; if ever there was one yeta mortal fear seized on
him: not for me; not for himself; a fear for his own child。 The
same day (without a word to me) he sent for the doctor。 I was
mean; wicked; what you pleaseI listened at the door。 I heard
him say: _I have something to tell my son; when my son grows old
enough to understand me。 Shall I live to tell it?_ The doctor
would say nothing certain。 The same night (still without a word
to me) he locked himself into his room。 What would any woman;
treated as I was; have done in my place? She would have done as I
didshe would have list ened again。 I heard him say to himself:
_I shall not live to tell it: I must; write it before I die。_ I
heard his pen scrape; scrape; scrape over the paper; I heard him
groaning and sobbing as he wrote; I implored him for God's sake
to let me in。 The cruel pen went scrape; scrape; scrape; the
cruel pen was all the answer he gave me。 I waited at the
doorhoursI don't know how long。 On a sudden; the pen stopped;
and I heard no more。 I whispered through the keyhole softly; I
said I was cold and weary with waiting; I said; Oh; my love; let
me in! Not even the cruel pen answered me now: silence answered
me。 With all the strength of my miserable hands I beat at the
door。 The servants came up and broke it in。 We were too late; the
harm was done。 Over that fatal letter; the stroke had struck
himover that fatal letter; we found him paralyzed as you see
him now。 Those words which he wants you to write are the words he
would have written himself if the stroke had spared him till the
morning From that time to this there has been a blank place left
in the letter; and it is that blank place which he has just asked
you to fill up。'In those words Mrs。 Armadale spoke to me; in
those words you have the sum and substance of all the information
I can give。 Say; if you please; sir; have I kept the thread at
last? Have I shown you the necessity which brings me here from
your countryman's death…bed?〃
〃Thus far;〃 said Mr。 Neal; 〃you merely show me that you are
exciting yourself。 This is too serious a matter to be treated as
you are treating it now。 You have involved Me in the business;
and I insist on seeing my way plainly。 Don't raise your hands;
your hands are not a part of the question。 If I am to be
concerned in the completion of this mysterious letter; it is only
an act of justifiable prudence on my part to inquire what the
letter is about。 Mrs。 Armadale appears to have favored you with
an infinite number of domestic particularsin return; I presume;
for your polite attention in taking her by the hand。 May I ask
what she could tell you about her husband's letter; so far as her
husband has written it?〃
〃Mrs。 Armadale could tell me nothing;〃 replied the doctor; with a
sudden formality in his manner; which showed that his forbearance
was at last failing him。 〃Before she was composed enough to think
of the letter; her husband had asked for it; and had caused it to
be locked up in his desk。 She knows that he has since; time after
time; tried to finish it; and that; time after time; the pen has
dropped from his fingers。 She knows; when all other hope of his
restoration was at an end; that his medical advisers encouraged
him to hope in the famous waters of this place。 And last; she
knows how that hope has ended; for she knows what I told her
husband this morning。〃
The frown which h