第 49 节
作者:
人生几何 更新:2022-07-08 12:26 字数:9322
ay; free to fly and face the last vengeance of the Holy Gods! Alas!
and alas! I did not dare to die。 Better the earth with all its woes
than the quick approach of those unimagined terrors that; hovering in
dim Amenti; wait the advent of the fallen。
I grovelled on the ground and wept tears of agony for the lost
unchanging pastwept till I could weep no more; but no answer came
from the silenceno answer but the echoes of my grief。 Not a ray of
hope! My soul wandered in a darkness more utter than that which was
about meI was forsaken of the Gods and cast out of men。 Terror took
hold upon me crouching in that lonely place hard by the majesty of the
awful Dead。 I rose to fly。 How could I fly in this gloom?And where
should I fly who had no place of refuge? Once more I crouched down;
and the great fear grew on me till the cold sweat ran from my brow and
my soul was faint within me。 Then; in my last despair; I prayed aloud
to Isis; to whom I had not dared to pray for many days。
〃O Isis! Holy Mother!〃 I cried; 〃put away Thy wrath; and of Thine
infinite pity; O Thou all…pitiful; hearken to the voice of the anguish
of him who was Thy son and servant; but who by sin hath fallen from
the vision of Thy love。 O throned Glory; who; being in all things;
hast of all things understanding and of all griefs knowledge; cast the
weight of Thy mercy against the scale of my evil…doing; and make the
balance equal。 Look down upon my woe; and measure it; count up the sum
of my repentance and take Thou note of the flood of sorrow that sweeps
my soul away。 O Thou Holy; whom it was given to me to look upon face
to face; by that dread hour of commune I summon Thee; I summon Thee by
the mystic word。 Come; then; in mercy; to save me; or; in anger; to
make an end of that which can no more be borne。〃
And; rising from my knees; I stretched out my arms and dared to cry
aloud the Word of Fear; to use which unworthily is death。
Swiftly the answer came。 For in the silence I heard the sound of the
shaken sistra heralding the coming of the Glory。 Then; at the far end
of the chamber; grew the semblance of the horned moon; gleaming
faintly in the darkness; and betwixt the golden horns rested a small
dark cloud; in and out of which the fiery serpent climbed。
My knees waxed loose in the presence of the Glory; and I sank down
before it。
Then spake the small; sweet Voice within the cloud:
〃Harmachis; who wast my servant and my son; I have heard thy prayer;
and the summons that thou hast dared to utter; which on the lips of
one with whom I have communed; hath power to draw Me from the
Uttermost。 No more; Harmachis; may we be one in the bond of Love
Divine; for thou hast put Me away of thine own act。 Therefore; after
this long silence I come; Harmachis; clothed in terrors; and;
perchance; ready for vengeance; for not lightly can Isis be drawn from
the halls of Her Divinity。〃
〃Smite; Goddess!〃 I answered。 〃Smite; and give me over to those who
wreak Thy vengeance; for I can no longer bear the burden of my woe!〃
〃And if thou canst not bear thy burden here; upon this upper earth;〃
came the soft reply; 〃how then shalt thou bear the greater burden that
shall be laid upon thee there; coming defiled and yet unpurified into
my dim realm of Death; that is Life and Change unending? Nay;
Harmachis; I smite thee not; for not all am I wroth that thou hast
dared to utter the awful Word which calls Me down to thee。 Hearken;
Harmachis; I praise not; and I reproach not; for I am the Minister of
Reward and Punishment and the Executrix of Decrees; and if I give; I
give in silence; and if I smite; in silence do I smite。 Therefore; I
will add naught to thy burden by the weight of heavy words; though
through thee it has come to pass that soon shall Isis; the Mother…
Mystery; be but a memory in Egypt。 Thou hast sinned; and heavy shall
be thy punishment; as I did warn thee; both in the flesh and in my
kingdom of Amenti。 But I told thee that there is a road of repentance;
and surely thy feet are set thereon; and therein must thou walk with a
humble heart; eating of the bread of bitterness; till such time as thy
doom be measured。〃
〃Have I; then; no hope; O holy?〃
〃That which is done; Harmachis; is done; nor can its issues be
altered。 Khem shall no more be free till all its temples are as the
desert dust; strange Peoples shall; from age to age; hold her hostage
and in bonds; new Religions shall arise and wither within the shadow
of her pyramids; for to every World; Race; and Age the countenances of
the Gods are changed。 This is the tree that shall spring from thy seed
of sin; Harmachis; and from the sin of those who tempted thee!〃
〃Alas! I am undone!〃 I cried。
〃Yea; thou art undone; and yet shall this be given to thee: thy
Destroyer thou shalt destroyfor so; in the purpose of my justice; it
is ordained。 When the sign comes to thee; arise; go to Cleopatra; and
in such manner as I shall put into thy heart do Heaven's vengeance
upon her! And now for thyself one word; for thou hast put Me from
thee; Harmachis; and no more shall I come face to face with thee till;
cycles hence; the last fruit of thy sin hath ceased to be upon this
earth! Yet; through the vastness of the unnumbered years; remember
thou this: the Love Divine is Love Eternal; which cannot be
extinguished; though it be everlastingly estranged。 Repent; my son;
repent and do well while there is yet time; that at the dim end of
ages thou mayest once more be gathered unto Me。 Still; Harmachis;
though thou seest Me not; still; when the very name by which thou
knowest Me has become a meaningless mystery to those who shall be
after thee; still I; whose hours are eternalI; who have watched
Universes wither; wane; and; beneath the breath of Time; melt into
nothingness; again to gather; and; re…born; thread the maze of space
still; I say; I shall companion thee。 Wherever thou goest; in whatever
form of life thou livest; there I shall be! Art thou wafted to the
farthest star; art thou buried in Amenti's lowest deepin lives; in
deaths; in sleeps; in wakings; in remembrances; in oblivions; in all
the fevers of the outer Life; in all the changes of the Spiritstill;
if thou wilt but atone and forget Me no more; I shall be with thee;
waiting thine hour of redemption。 For this is the nature of Love
Divine; wherewith it loves that which partakes of its divinity and by
the holy tie hath once been bound to it。 Judge then; Harmachis: was it
well to put this from thee to win the dust of earthly woman? And; now;
dare not again to utter the Word of Power till these things are done!
Harmachis; for this season; fare thee well!〃
As the last note of the sweet Voice died away; the fiery snake climbed
into the heart of the cloud。 Now the cloud rolled from the horns of
light; and was gathered into the blackness。 The vision of the crescent
moon grew dim and vanished。 Then; as the Goddess passed; once more
came the faint and dreadful music of the shaken sistra; and all was
still。
I hid my face in my robe; and even then; though my outstretched hand
could touch the chill corpse of that father who had died cursing me; I
felt hope come back into my heart; knowing that I was not altogether
lost nor utterly rejected of Her whom I had forsaken; but whom I yet
loved。 And then weariness overpowered me; and I slept。
I woke; the faint lights of dawn were creeping from the opening in the
roof。 Ghastly they lay upon the shadowy sculptured walls and ghastly
upon the dead face and white beard of my father; the gathered to
Osiris。 I started up; remembering all things; and wondering in my
heart what I should do; and as I rose I heard a faint footfall
creeping down the passage of the names of the Pharaohs。
〃/La! La! La!/〃 mumbled a voice that I knew for the voice of the old
wife; Atoua。 〃Why; 'tis dark as the House of the Dead! The Holy Ones
who built this Temple loved not the blessed sun; however much they
worshipped him。 Now; where's the curtain?〃
Presently it was drawn; and Atoua entered; a stick in one hand and a
basket in the other。 Her face was somewhat more wrinkled; and her
scanty locks were somewhat whiter than aforetime; but for the rest she
was as she had ever been。 She stood and peered around with her sharp
black eyes; for as yet she could see nothing because of the shadows。
〃Now where is he?〃 she muttered。 〃Osirisglory to His namesend that
he has not wandered in the night; and he blind! Alack! that I could
not return before the dark。 Alack! and alack! what times have we
fallen on; when the Holy High Priest and the Governor; by descent; of
Abouthis; is left with one aged crone to minister to his infirmity! O
Harmachis; my poor boy; thou hast laid trouble at our doors! Why;
what's this? Surely he sleeps not; there upon the ground?'twill be
his death! Prince! Holy Father! Amenemhat! awake; arise!〃 and she
h