第 25 节
作者:
人生几何 更新:2022-07-08 12:26 字数:9322
that we were destined to stand together; I; as the Queen; and thou;
perchance; Harmachis; as one of the chief pillars of my throne; and
thus to work each other's weal。〃
〃Or maybe each other's woe;〃 I answered; looking up; for her sweet
speeches stung my ears and brought more colour to my face than I loved
that she should see there。
〃Nay; never talk of woe。 Be seated here by me; Harmachis; and let us
talk; not as Queen and subject; but as friend to friend。 Thou wast
angered with me at the feast to…night because I mocked thee with
yonder wreathwas it not so? Nay; it was but a jest。 Didst thou know
how heavy is the task of monarchs and how wearisome are their hours;
thou wouldst not be wroth because I lit my dulness with a jest。 Oh;
they weary me; those princes and those nobles; and those stiff…necked
pompous Romans。 To my face they vow themselves my slaves; and behind
my back they mock me and proclaim me the servant of their Triumvirate;
or their Empire; or their Republic; as the wheel of Fortune turns; and
each rises on its round! There is never a man among themnothing but
fools; parasites; and puppetsnever a man since with their coward
daggers they slew that C?sar whom all the world in arms was not strong
enough to tame。 And I must play off one against the other; if maybe;
by so doing; I can keep Egypt from their grip。 And for reward; what?
Why; this is my rewardthat all men speak ill of meand; I know it;
my subjects hate me! Yes; I believe that; woman though I am; they
would murder me could they find a means!〃
She paused; covering her eyes with her hand; and it was well; for her
words pierced me so that I shrank upon the seat beside her。
〃They think ill of me; I know it; and call me wanton; who have never
stepped aside save once; when I loved the greatest man of all the
world; and at the touch of love my passion flamed indeed; but burnt a
hallowed flame。 These ribald Alexandrians swear that I poisoned
Ptolemy; my brotherwhom the Roman Senate would; most unnaturally;
have forced on me; his sister; as a husband! But it is false: he
sickened and died of fever。 And even so they say that I would slay
Arsino?; my sisterwho; indeed; would slay me!but that; too; is
false! Though she will have none of me; I love my sister。 Yes; they
all think ill of me without a cause; even thou dost think ill of me;
Harmachis。
〃O Harmachis; before thou judgest; remember what a thing is envy!
that foul sickness of the mind which makes the jaundiced eye of
pettiness to see all things distraughtto read Evil written on the
open face of Good; and find impurity in the whitest virgin's soul!
Think what a thing it is; Harmachis; to be set on high above the
gaping crowd of knaves who hate thee for thy fortune and thy wit; who
gnash their teeth and shoot the arrows of their lies from the cover of
their own obscureness; whence they have no wings to soar; and whose
hearts' quest it is to drag down thy nobility to the level of the
groundling and the fool!
〃Be not; then; swift to think evil of the Great; whose every word and
act is searched for error by a million angry eyes; and whose most tiny
fault is trumpeted by a thousand throats; till the world shakes with
echoes of their sin! Say not: 'It is thus; 'tis certainly thus'say;
rather: 'May it not be otherwise? Have we heard aright? Did she this
thing of her own will?' Judge gently; Harmachis; as wert thou I thou
wouldst be judged。 Remember that a Queen is never free。 She is;
indeed; but the point and instrument of those forces politic with
which the iron books of history are graved。 O Harmachis! be thou my
friendmy friend and counsellor!my friend whom I can trust indeed!
for here; in this crowded Court; I am more utterly alone than any
soul that breathes about its corridors。 But /thee/ I trust; there is
faith written in those quiet eyes; and I am minded to lift thee high;
Harmachis。 I can no longer bear my solitude of mindI must find one
with whom I may commune and speak that which lies within my heart。 I
have faults; I know it; but I am not all unworthy of thy faith; for
there is good grain among the evil seed。 Say; Harmachis; wilt thou
take pity on my loneliness and befriend me; who have lovers;
courtiers; slaves; dependents; more thick than I can count; but never
one single /friend/?〃 and she leant towards me; touching me lightly;
and gazed on me with her wonderful blue eyes。
I was overcome; thinking of the morrow night; shame and sorrow smote
me。 /I/; her friend!/I/; whose assassin dagger lay against my
breast! I bent my head; and a sob or a groan; I know not which; burst
from the agony of my heart。
But Cleopatra; thinking only that I was moved beyond myself by the
surprise of her graciousness; smiled sweetly; and said:
〃It grows late; to…morrow night when thou bringest the auguries we
will speak again; O my friend Harmachis; and thou shalt answer me。〃
And she gave me her hand to kiss。 Scarce knowing what I did; I kissed
it; and in another moment she was gone。
But I stood in the chamber; gazing after her like one asleep。
CHAPTER VI
OF THE WORDS AND JEALOUSY OF CHARMION; OF THE LAUGHTER OF
HARMACHIS; OF THE MAKING READY FOR THE DEED OF BLOOD; AND OF THE
I stood still; plunged in thought。 Then by hazard as it were I took up
the wreath of roses and looked on it。 How long I stood so I know not;
but when next I lifted up my eyes they fell upon the form of Charmion;
whom; indeed; I had altogether forgotten。 And though at the moment I
thought but little of it; I noted vaguely that she was flushed as
though with anger; and beat her foot upon the floor。
〃Oh; it is thou; Charmion!〃 I said。 〃What ails thee? Art thou cramped
with standing so long in thy hiding…place? Why didst not thou slip
hence when Cleopatra led me to the balcony?〃
〃Where is my kerchief?〃 she asked; shooting an angry glance at me。 〃I
let fall my broidered kerchief。〃
〃Thy kerchief!why; didst thou not see? Cleopatra twitted me about
it; and I flung it from the balcony。〃
〃Yes; I saw;〃 answered the girl; 〃I saw but too well。 Thou didst fling
away my kerchief; but the wreath of rosesthat thou wouldst not fling
away。 It was 'a Queen's gift;' forsooth; and therefore the royal
Harmachis; the Priest of Isis; the chosen of the Gods; the crowned
Pharaoh wed to the weal of Khem; cherished it and saved it。 But my
kerchief; stung by the laughter of that light Queen; he cast away!〃
〃What meanest thou?〃 I asked; astonished at her bitter tone。 〃I cannot
read thy riddles。〃
〃What mean I?〃 she answered; tossing up her head and showing the white
curves of her throat。 〃Nay; I mean naught; or all; take it as thou
wilt。 Wouldst know what I mean; Harmachis; my cousin and my Lord?〃 she
went on in a hard; low voice。 〃Then I will tell theethou art in
danger of the great offence。 This Cleopatra has cast her fatal wiles
about thee; and thou goest near to loving her; Harmachisto loving
her whom to…morrow thou must slay! Ay; stand and stare at that wreath
in thy handthe wreath thou couldst not send to join my kerchief
sure Cleopatra wore it but to…night! The perfume of the hair of
C?sar's mistressC?sar's and others'yet mingles with the odour of
its roses! Now; prithee; Harmachis; how far didst thou carry the
matter on yonder balcony? for in that hole where I lay hid I could not
hear or see。 'Tis a sweet spot for lovers; is it not?ay; and a sweet
hour; too? Venus surely rules the stars to…night?〃
All of this she said so quietly and in so soft and modest a way;
though her words were not modest; and yet so bitterly; that every
syllable cut me to the heart; and angered me till I could find no
speech。
〃Of a truth thou hast a wise economy;〃 she went on; seeing her
advantage: 〃to…night thou dost kiss the lips that to…morrow thou shalt
still for ever! It is frugal dealing with the occasion of the moment;
ay; worthy and honourable dealing!〃
Then at last I broke forth。 〃Girl;〃 I cried; 〃how darest thou speak
thus to me? Mindest thou who and what I am that thou loosest thy
peevish gibes upon me?〃
〃I mind what it behoves thee to be;〃 she answered quick。 〃What thou
art; that I mind not now。 Surely thou knowest alonethou and
Cleopatra!〃
〃What meanest thou?〃 I said。 〃Am I to blame if the Queen〃
〃The Queen! What have we here? Pharaoh owns a Queen!〃
〃If Cleopatra wills to come hither of a night and talk〃
〃Of stars; Harmachissurely of stars and roses; and naught beside!〃
After that I know not what I said; for; troubled as I was; the girl's
bitter tongue and quiet way drove me wellnigh to madness。 But this I
know: I spoke so fiercely that she cowered before me as she had
cowered before my uncle Sepa when he rated her because of her Grecian
garb。 And as she wept then; so she wept now; only more passionately
and with great sobs。
At length I ceased; half…shamed but still angry